A lot of things change when you are in a committed relationship. I’m not that party girl I was in college. I’m not a girl who lives to go clubbing. I’m the girl who is totally fine hanging out at the house with or without a bottle of whiskey and a close group of friends. I’m the girl who would rather go to a restaurant to have a few drinks rather than pay $150 a weekend going to uptown. I’m the girl who would rather wear jeans and a t-shirt and skip out on the skirt and blouse. I’m the girl who would much rather wake up to the same woman every day, than going home with someone new every night. Some might say that I don’t have much of a social life anymore, but honestly, I’m fine with that. I’m not your average 23-year-old I would presume.
Being in college was a blast. I would party with my friends when I wanted to. I would drink on days where I had nothing to do after classes. I would go to work and stay up until 3 in the morning having sleepovers in the living room with my roommates. College was amazing to say the least. As fun as it was, it’s the past. It’s who I was before I landed a big girl job. Now that I’m a school teacher and a coach I’m in bed most nights by 10. The time that I do get off I’m relaxing with my girlfriend and my dog, because my body is worn down. Surely other people get this way once “grown up” life takes over.
As “boring” as I may seem, I love the life I live. I still have the same friends from college although they live 4 hours away from me. I still see my family weekly. I still love to have fun. There are a few people who don’t necessarily enjoy the new me. They feel neglected, and I can somewhat see where they are coming from. They still love going out every weekend, and functioning on little to no sleep. I, on the other hand, can not do that. Physically, or mentally. I need my beauty sleep for sure. As much as we tried to not face it, the fact is, things change. We all have to grow up at some point. My grown up won’t be the same as your grown up, which is perfectly fine. Just like we are all different, so are out opinions.
Sometimes I miss the old, carefree, Shelbie. Mainly the carefree part, not having bills, not working everyday, not having to come home and grade papers, etc. Other than that, I love my life. I love who I am. I love being in a committed relationship and coming home to the same person every day. I love grabbing my girl and spontaneously dancing in the kitchen instead of gettin’ it on the dance floor. This is who I am. And I love who I am. The people who love me enough to stick around will hold on to me, and accept me for who I am. They’ll accept that Tawny is now apart of me too, and it’s not me anymore. Those who matter will be here, those who don’t, well…I hope a memory of the old me will suffice.